Byzantine empire ✓

Justinian code — the code Justinian made for a standard of laws from romans.

Eastern orthodox church; Led by the patriarch, greek, in east, orthodox. Its pretty legit.

Orthodoxy-the true teaching according to the church leaders. 

Heresy-the false teaching according to the church leaders .

Apse-a semicircular recess uncovered with a hemispherical (dome shape) vault.

nika revolt-basically the townspeople and the rich people were in the hippodrome, and Justinian was taxing the people at a very high rate at this time, in order to go conquer all the places, so everyone instead of fighting over who would win the chariot races turned their anger toward Justinian and when on a drunken rampage through the streets, so much to the point that Justinian was going to flee( that wimp)  until his wife ( Theodora) made a wonderful speech about how she would rather die being an empress rather than die a nomadic nobody. Because bi*ches, you know I look better in purple, and purple is only for emperors/high class people.

Iconoclastic controversy-there was a controversy between if there should be icons anymore because illiterate people were not understanding that the icon was just a representation, and that they should not be praying to the actual images, but rather the meaning behind them. The whole thing became such a huge controversy that the church split into two parts, east and west. BECAUSE VIOLENCE AND SPLITTING solves everything.

Mosaic-a pretty picture compiled of small rocks, stones or glass.

Cyrillic alphabet-so these two monks were trading and spreading the ideas of roman and greeks while converting people to catholic religion, so then they came across these slavic who had a pretty legit reason to convert: they couldn’t read the bible , so the monks made a slavic alphabet , and made it possible for them to read the bible.

byzantine art: the people appear to have long, stretched out bodies, long noses, huge / disproportional eyes, almond shape heads, and a flat figure. also has an attitude that clearly reads “ my hips don’t lie motherf*cker”

,Narthex:not at all like Narnia , like you hoped instead its just a lame entrance to a church.

Hagia sophia: it literally translates to “ wisdom” so you motherf*cking know it be the bomb. Justinian spent so much time on this d*mn building that they went into debt because of it. The f*cking building was a round dome on top of a square building, which apparently was like f*cking wizardry. So you best know everyone be visiting it. We spent 2 class periods just talking about this damn building, which doesn’t even have the minbar anymore . The f*cking minarets aren’t even used, like come on, appreciate the islam religion people. it's a damn museum now. basically, this is the Parthenon of the f8cking byzantine empire, except Justinian was just being a selfish douche and wanted a giant church that symbolized state power and religion , so he could be like “ f*ck yeah my empire is sick”

Geography: the city of Constantinople was strategically placed in a rich area of marketing, so all the monies came to them by the Bosphorus strait, and today the strait still remains one of the richest producers of money makers,transporting more than 50% of the world oil all around the world and getting mad money.

Domes-no, not your doom, but much rather those funny endings of a building that look like a nice hill atop a building.

The great schism-point in time which 2 sides split

Why did the empire last so long? The empire was so motherf*cking awesome there was no chance it was going down. You know the hell why it lasted so long, that’s why we had to do the stupid legacy paper last night. if you have a big piece of land, you gotta rule it right, you have to have an efficient , organized way to rule your little subjects, bitches this was the most efficient bureaucracy we’ve seen in a while, it maintained order in times of “ turmoil” which apparently translates to “ when somebody f*cks up”

Bezant-like the american dollar, before the invention of the bezant they were trading , 1 chicken for 1 lamb, you know? So you’d have to carry a sack of chickens everywhere with you. A real inconvenience.

fall of the empire-

Yo so the empire was doing pretty good, it has all it needed, no one could destroy this motherf*cker. much like when your side hoe decides to send the picture of you two together to your main hoe, LITTLE B*TCH ITALY  wanted ALL ZE POWER. SO IT F*CKING BETRAYED THE BYZANTINES. AND MADE THE 4TH CRUSADERS KILL EVERYONE IN THE EMPIRE.  The byzantines were very sad, and weakened forever. Eventually the f*cking muslims captured the great city of Constantinople, and made everything into mosques and made it even more AMAZING before… but was it all rainbows and unicorns? …. Find out next unit when he continues to make us copy down notes and not teach us .